作者:伊丽莎白·盖斯凯尔
|类型:都市·校园
|更新时间:2019-10-06 10:05
|本章字节:12262字
youcouldnoundersandiall,ifioldyoumyanxiey,foryears
pas,oknowwheherihadanyrighoholdmylivingmyefforsoquenchmysmoulderingdoubsbyheauhoriyofhechurchoh!
margare,howiloveheholychurchfromwhichiamobeshuou!
hecouldnogoonforamomenorwomargarecouldnoellwhaosay;iseemedoheraserriblymyseriousasifherfaherwereabouournmahomean
ihavebeenreadingodayofhewohousandwhowereejecedfromheirchurches,coninuedmrhale,smilingfainly, ryingosealsomeofheirbravery;buiisofnousenouseica
ohelpfeelingiacuely
u,papa,haveyouwellconsidered?oh!iseemssoerrible,soshocking,saidmargare,suddenlybursinginoearsheonesaidfoundaionofherhome,ofherideaofherbelovedfaher,seemedreelingandrockingwhacouldshesay?whawasobedone?hesighofherdisressmademrhalenervehimself,inorderoryandcomforherheswalloweddownhedrychokingsobswhichhadbeenheavingupfromhishearhihero,andgoingohisbookcaseheookdownavolume,whichhehadofenbeenreadingely,andfromwhichhehoughhehadderivedsrenghoeneruponhecourseinwhichhewasnowembarked
lisen,dearmargare,saidhe,puingonearmroundherwaissheookhishandinhersandgraspediigh,bushecouldnolifupherhead;norindeedcouldsheaendowhaheread,sogreawasherinernalagiaion
hisishesoliloquyofonewhowasonceaclergymaninacounryparish,likeme;iwaswrienbyamroldfield,miniserofcarsingon,inderbyshire,ahundredandsixyyearsago,ormorehisrialsareoverhefoughhegoodfighheseswosenenceshespokelow,asifohimselfhenhereadaloud,
whenhoucansnolongerconinueinhyworkwihoudishonourogod,discredioreligion,foregoinghyinegriy,woundingconscience,spoilinghypeace,andhazardinghelossofhysalvaion;inaword,whenhecondiionsuponwhichhoumusconinue(ifhouwilconinue)inhyemploymensaresinful,andunwarranedbyhewordofgod,houmayes,yea,houmusbelievehagodwillurnhyverysilence,suspension,deprivaion,andyingaside,ohisglory,andheadvancemenofhegospelsinereswhengodwillnouseheeinonekind,yehewillinanoherasoulhadesiresoserveandhonourhimshallneverwanopporuniyodoi;normushousolimiheholyoneofisraelasohinkhehahbuonewayinwhichhecanglorifyhimselfbyheehecandoibyhysilenceaswellasbyhypreaching;hyyingasideaswellashyconinuanceinhyworkiisnopreenceofdoinggodhegreaesservice,orperforming
heweighiesduy,hawillexcuseheleassin,houghhasincapaciaedorgaveusheopporuniyfordoinghaduyhouwilhavelilehanks,0mysoul!if,whenhouarchargedwihcorrupinggodsworship,falsifyinghyvows,houpreendesanecessiyforiinorderoaconinuanceinheminisry
ashereadhis,andgncedamuchmorewhichhedidnoread,hegainedresoluionforhimself,andfelasifheoocouldbebraveandfirmindoingwhahebelievedoberigh;buasheceasedheheardmargareslowconvulsivesob;andhiscouragesankdownunderhekeensenseofsuffering
margare,dear!saidhe,drawinghercloser, hinkofheearlymaryrs;hinkofhehousandswhohavesuffered
u,faher,saidshe,suddenlylifingupherflushed,earweface, heearlymaryrssufferedforheruh,whileyouoh!dear,dearpapa!
isufferforconsciencesake,mychild,saidhe,wihadigniyhawasonlyremulousfromheacuesensiivenessofhischaracer;imusdowhamyconsciencebidsihavebornelongwihselfreproachhawouldhaverousedanymindlessorpidandcowardlyhanmineheshookhisheadashewenonyourpoormohersfondwish,graifiedasinhemockingwayinwhichoverfondwishesareooofenfulfilledsodomapplesasheyarehasbroughonhiscrisis,forwhichioughobe,andihopeiamhankfuliisnoamonhsincehebishopofferedmeanoherliving;ifihadaccepedi,ishouldhavehadomakeafreshdecraionofconformiyoheliurgyamyinsiuionmargare,iriedodoi;iriedoconenmyselfwihsimplyrefusingheaddiionalprefermen,andsoppingquielyhere,sranglingmyconsciencenow,asihadsrainedibeforegodforgiveme!
heroseandwalkedupanddownheroom,speakinglowwordsofselfreproachandhumiliaion,ofwhichmargarewashankfulohearbufewashesaid,margare,ireurnoheoldsadburdenwemusleavehelsone
yes!iseebuwhen?
ihavewrienohebishopidaresayihaveoldyouso,buiforgehingsjusnow,saidmrhale,colpsinginohisdepressedma
erassoonashecameoalkofhardmaeroffacdeails,informinghimofmyinenionoresignhisvicaragehehasbeenmoskind;hehasusedargumensandexposuions,allinvaininvainheyarebuwhaihaverieduponmyself,wihouavailishallhaveoakemydeedofresignaion,andwaiuponhebishopmyself,obidhimfarewellhawillbearial,buworse,farworse,willbeheparingfrommydearpeoplehereisacuraeappoinedoreadprayersamrbrownhewillcomeosaywihusomorrownexsundayipreachmyfarewell
sermon
wasiobesosuddenhen?houghmargare;andyeperhapsiwasaswelllingeringwouldonlyaddsingsohepain;iwasbeerobesu
edinonumbnessbyhearingofallhesearrangemens,whichseemedobenearlycompleedbeforeshehadbeenoldwhadoesmammasay?askedshe,wihadeepsigh
ohersurprise,herfaherbeganowalkabouagainbeforeheansweredalenghhesoppedandreplied: